Please HELP! 

Date: 1999, Aug 20
From: Darlene <CutiePieQQ@aol.com>

I will try to make this as short as I can....My Mother-in-law who will be 85 in Jan. lives 600 miles north of us, (that would be my husband, myself and our two girls ages 21 & 17) in a very small town. My husband is an only child. We are, that is my husband named first and myself second her Attorney-in-fact on her Durable Power of Attorney which we have for her heath and for her assets. We are seeing signs of Alzheimer's and or Dementia with her 4 to 5 phone calls a day and not remembering that she called before She will call and tell us that the neighbors are stealing from her or that they are taking things and then painting them then putting them back. She will call and say that they are replacing things of hers with things of theirs. She will call and say that even being 600 miles away, that we come up there for the day and also take things....We know none of this is true because we have had many calls from the police, banks and neighbors about how she is causing trouble in the neighborhood. She tells us that she cant go anywhere due to the fact that when she leaves people get into her house and steal from her. She is up all night just going over and over her paper work and then will call all confused and get really REALLY upset when we dont know about her taxes, investments etc.due to the fact that she keeps everything a secret. She calls and tells us that she cant find her keys or bank paper or tax returns and God forbid you say they will turn up. She has called and said she cant do it anymore that she is going to run her car into a tree or kill herself with a gun. She has even said that she is going to kill this neighbor or that one for some reason or another. (We have made sure that she has no bullets and that she cant buy them either.) We do know that whatever we do do.........she is going to put up a fight.... Can we "make" her go to the Dr. and get tested to see if she does have Alzheimer's or if she is sound of mind?? If we even mention it on the phone she gets mad saying she isn't crazy. Does having the Power of Attorney give us that right? We have even talked about maybe if we take away all her paper work then she will be able to rest at night. Does having the Power of Attorney give us that right also? If someone would just say this is how you do it.....step one is....then step two...etc.... We dont want to put her in a home as long as she will let us have someone come in and check on her. She has made it very clear that she dont want to go into a home or for that matter move down here with us or even by us. We are really not sure what to do or how to do it, we do think our 1st step is to get her to a Dr. but what if she wont go, then what?? Can we make her go? Any help will be God sent! Thanks Darlene